The Daily Swarm

TANGENTIAL UPDATE: Download Dr. John Clarke’s Swine Flu song! (via Music for Maniacs). AMAZING.

“Hip-Hop Health: Learning Concepts through Physical Activity” (or ”I was a camp counselor once, and all the kids really seemed to dig-I-mean-hella-groove-on my positive raps when I recited-I-mean-flowed so I made this laughable DVD to inspire them to not be fat and hopefully read too or something”).

If you couldn’t quite follow the intricate wordplay of the first attack, here’s a transcript:

Yo.

Welcome superheros time to fight the foes,
Good versus evil but there’s nothing to fear ‘yo,
Villains are willin’ to use up our ability,
We got the power of super flexibility,
Complete stability,
To stay strong for you and me,
We’re raw superheros,
Be all that you can be,

FLEX! YO FLEX!

FLEX! YO FLEX!

FLEX! YO FLEX!

YO IT’S TIME TO FLEX!

“Stability” and “me” don’t rhyme. For the record. And a rhyming dictionary isn’t for the purpose of using every word with a particular suffix in a single stanza, or whatever they’re called in rap.

Hopefully whoever bankrolled this shitpile will in the future avoid putting in the driver’s seat of our children’s health and opinion of rap any sports-oriented, middle-aged, state-college-educated, spuriously musical opportunist.

(photo courtesy of Street Boners)

via Invisible Oranges

Three videos – of frustrating quality – showing Mr. Kilmister and his backing band Metallica playing “Damage Case” and “Too Late Too Late” in Nashville, September 14.